


No (Three) Way!

by stellarmeadow



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: A little crack, Buck is clueless, Clueless Buck is lucky he's adorable, Eddie is also a little clueless, Fluff, M/M, and possessive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:08:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24886603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellarmeadow/pseuds/stellarmeadow
Summary: Buck is a little oblivious to the messages from his new friends.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 46
Kudos: 374





	No (Three) Way!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tarialdarion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tarialdarion/gifts).



> This one really is all tarialdarion's fault. 100%.

_Hey thanks for that recipe for Ratatouille! Jill loved it!_

_No problem – I’ve tried a bunch and that was the best!_

Buck looked up as Eddie approached, coffee in hand. “Thanks,” Buck said, as he took a sip. “How is it you can always manage to get just the right amount of sugar in my coffee?”

Eddie sat down, careful not to spill his own cup. “Because I pay attention.” Eddie took a sip before nodding at Buck’s phone. “That that Nate guy from the other night again?”

“Yeah, we’ve been exchanging recipes.”

“What is it with firefighters who cook, anyway?” Eddie asked, leaning over to see Buck’s screen. 

Buck shrugged carefully, so as not to dislodge Eddie’s chin from his shoulder. “Lots of time and a really nice kitchen?” he said, before grinning at Eddie. “Just because you can’t even boil water….” 

“Hey, but I can make coffee.” 

“That you can,” Buck said, taking a long drink. “Nice to know you’re not completely terrible in the kitchen.” 

“Some of us just spent more time practicing our skills in other rooms of the house.”

Buck absolutely, positively did not almost choke on his coffee at that. “I don’t think stinking up the bathroom on a regular basis counts as practice, Eds.”

Which earned him a disgruntled huff, but Eddie didn’t move away, which was all that mattered. “Hey, new message,” Eddie said.

_Jill says she thinks you might be a better cook than me_

_Blame our Captain – he’s a great teacher_

“Oh yeah?” Eddie said. “Then why is it I’m still a terrible cook?”

“Because even the best teacher has to have _something_ to work with.”

That got him a poke in the side, but he’d managed to keep Eddie from figuring out so far that he was ticklish and, again, Eddie didn’t move away, so, fine. 

_Oh now Jill is saying she thinks you might be better at other things, too and suggesting a threesome._

Buck laughed, but Eddie had gone completely still. 

“I always thought it was only guys who joked about that,” Buck said. Eddie remained very still, chin like a rock on Buck’s shoulder, so Buck sent the same message in text to Nate. 

_Jill’s pretty open like that_

“Wow, they must have a cool marriage,” Buck said. “To be able to joke around like that.”

“Buck.” Eddie’s voice was quiet and laced with…something in Buck’s ear.

Buck turned, leaning away just enough to dislodge Eddie from his shoulder and look at him. “What?”

“He’s not joking.” 

“Sure he is.” 

Eddie shook his head. “Chim!” he called, without looking away from Buck. When Chim joined them, Eddie took Buck’s phone hand handed it to him. “Joking or no?” Eddie asked.

Chim read it quickly. “Yeah, that’s not a joke.” 

“Okay,” Buck said, “no offense, Chimney, but you would try to convince me it wasn’t a joke even if it is.”

“Hen!” Both Eddie and Chim called out at the same time. 

When she reached the couch, Chim handed her the phone. “Oh boy,” she said. “That is _not_ a joke.”

Buck looked at each of them in turn. Chim looked like he couldn’t wait to text Maddie. Hen just looked amused and a little sorry for him. And Eddie looked like…well, Buck wasn’t quite sure what that look was, or why it was making goose bumps pop up all over his body. 

But he liked it.

Still, he was sure this wasn’t an actual proposition. 

Okay, he was mostly sure. 

He read the messages again. 

“Oh fuck.” He looked at all of them. “What do I say?”

Eddie’s answer was quick and blunt. “No.” 

“You can’t answer like that,” Chim said. “They didn’t actually come out and ask.” 

Buck latched onto that. “Right, so that means they’re not serious, right?”

“It’s a sideways ask, Buck,” Hen said. “It’s how people feel out the situation.”

“To find out if they can feel you up,” Chim added.

Hen elbowed him in the ribs before handing Buck back his phone. “Just pretend like it’s a joke but say, ‘Ha, tell her that’s never gonna happen!’ and that should take care of it.

“But that seems so…rude.”

“They just asked you for a threesome,” Eddie ground out. “And you’re worried about being rude?” 

“But they weren’t rude about it,” Buck said.

Eddie pressed his lips together and took a deep breath before looking up at Hen, eyebrows raised.

“It’s not rude,” Hen said. 

It sounded pretty rude. But Buck had to say something. _Ha! That might get a bit awkward at the next fire!_

“Buck.” Eddie’s voice growled in Buck’s ear. “That is not helping.” 

“Sure it is! I gave them a reason and it’s fine now. You’ll see.” 

Hen grabbed the phone. “That is not what I told you to say.” 

“Yeah, but I didn’t want to be rude.” 

He heard the phone ping. Hen read the message before handing it back to him, shaking her head.

_I mean, I don’t think it would be something that would be awkward_

Oh shit. Buck looked up at Hen. “They’re not joking?”

“What have we been telling you?” Eddie said, leaning in to read the message. “Oh hell no,” he said, when he was done. “Give me that.” 

Eddie grabbed the phone and started typing as Buck watched. _Hi I’m Buck’s boyfriend_

“You’re my what now?” Buck said.

Eddie kept typing. _He doesn’t want to sleep with you. bye._ he typed before he hit send.

“I want to sleep with you?”

Eddie looked up, eyes wide. “What?” 

“Well you just told Nate you were my boyfriend, so clearly now I want to sleep with you.”

“You do?”

Buck looked around for help, but Chim and Hen had done a really good job of disappearing at some point. “I mean…um…well, you said….” Buck held up the phone. 

“Oh. You were joking,” Eddie’s smile seemed a bit forced. “I get it.” 

Buck sighed, leaning in until Eddie met his eyes. “Did we not just cover the fact that I have no idea how to joke like that?” 

Eddie blinked several times before saying, “You’re not joking?”

Buck leaned in and let a kiss answer for him.

\--  
END

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos make me smile all day long! (And fuel the bunnies...) ❤️ Come find me on [tumblr](https://stellarm.tumblr.com/)!


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